Depluggin the family….one wire at a time
First, there was the television. Oh, how I fought having one, after marriage. My daughter and I had always functioned quite nicely without one. We had…books; art; we had…brains, and conversation. There were always meals to make from “ooooh, doesn’t that look good!” recipes, and science experiments to try (can you really magnetize that? Let’s try!”). Our seemingly endless activities, IQ exercises, discussions, and mental meanderings left NO ROOM for something so stupid as….living your life through a hollywood actor. But, love is blind, and “the man” was oh so convincing.
“Our new baby can learn to be BILINGUAL with these Muzzy videos! It’s the deal of the century, but we have to buy now!”
“No way”
“I’ts FOR the kid, mama…”
“No, honey, it will be abused”
“Look, I know it got abused at our old house, but I threw the DVD player out just as soon as I learned it had a TV function”
“No, Eric, you watched it non stop”
“Well, yea… I watched DVDs”
“….and tv shows….”.
“Wellll….did I do that? Really? i thought I only watched DVDs”
“Husband, how can you lie like that… you KNOW you watched Tv”
“Did I? I really thought I was watching DVDs but I ‘m not here to fight with you”.
“Good. Cause we are NOT getting a TV”.
“Well, honey, how about this…how about we have a TV room”
“NO way…”
…to keep the Tv from distracting you
“You mean to keep you free from lectures while you o.d. on westerns”
“No, honey, I told you, it’s for the kid”.
“Okay, Husband. IF and I mean IF you find a VCRr WITHOUT tv, and if you solemnly swear to only play Muzzy Videos, then we’ll do it”.
Three broken thrift store gadgets and one complete muzzy video set later, the man is wearing me down.
“We already bought the videos” he whines. “They don’t SELL VCr players anymore without TV”
“That’s your problem”
“But don’t you want our kid to be bilingual? Now is the time for their brains to learn”
17 years later, I am now looking at a dead set of muzzy videos that were viewed maybe three times and are rotting in the corner along with countless tvs traded in for something cooler, newer and that we just had to have. I am pleased to say that there is no television upstairs, but what does it matter? My business requires me to be online, and they always manage to collectively gang up on me after dinner…with a plan
“Hey Mama sue, daddy found a great movie for us all to watch!”
“What is it”
“Battle of the Angels”
“That sounds spiritual. Okay, why not”
The angel was a robot with no soul that a human falls in love with. Weird, but not as bizarre as the sound effects. Super creepy, worldly vibe. Too late. They love it. They’d hate me for nixing it. The tightly clad girl with the elfin features and wet suit seems like soft porn, but how do I protest against a cartoon character with the sexy voice who ends up being a real human with cartoon like features airbrushed on? No, i’ll just be the backward, puritanical freak with impossible standards if I dare to suggest that my family watches something more wholesome. (like, it’s a cartoon, mommmmm)
I suddenly realize…my teenagers and husband in no way share my values when it comes to entertainment. Letting them make the selections without me is insane.
The New Rule
All family members must unanimously agree that a movie is okay.
Mom and dad must preview it from start to finish….first, before the kids (what a great way to spend time together away from the teens).
Mom and dad must both be unoffended and satisfied with the movie. No one can accuse the other for over reacting; each persons verdict of “filth” or ‘boring” must be respected by the other.
Non helpful comments like “all you like is garbage” or “you don’t like anything!” are to be avoided.
AT the end of the day, it just might be more helpful to find some real value to share together.
On the table side by side, >The Holy Bible and the TV Guide.
One is well worn and cherished with pride, No,
not the Bible—– the TV Guide!
As the pages are turned what shall they see? “Who cares! Stop fighting—turn on the TV”.
Confusion then reins for they can’t all agree, What they shall watch on that old TV.
So they turn to the Book in which they confide, No! Not the Bible– the TV Guide!
The Word of God is seldom read,Maybe a verse or two just before bed.
Exhausted and sleepy, tired as can be, Not from reading the Bible, but from watching TV.
Then back to the table, side by side, The Holy Bible and the TV Guide.
No time for prayer, no time for the Word. The plan of salvation is seldom heard.
Forgiveness of sin so full and free, is found in the Bible and not the TV.
